time and time again

[Sky]

And Axel kissed her back, like he hadn't kissed her in years. It was probably the most passionate kiss he had ever had. But then he remembered. He pulled back quickly.

"You're married." He breathed.

[potter_fan122]

"Oh..." she said dumbly.  Her lips tingled with the kiss, and Seth was not something she wanted to talk about right now.

Slowly Alice pushed away from Axel and pulled her knees up to her chest.  She was married, and she just kissed her husband's cousin.  And she didn't really care.

"I know, but... God, he's just so understanding!" She practically growled, hiding her face in her arms.

[Sky]

"Why did you marry him then? You knew that when you dated." Axel said, still staring at her. He pushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

[potter_fan122]

"Because I love him," she answered softly, "I love him a lot, but it's my vampire side that loves him. I'm not a vampire anymore.  Not really."

[purpleraincloud]

Tears ran down Avalee's face. Silent tears, as she stared, her mouth open. She was in shock. The icy air? She couldn't feel it. The snow that seeped into her boots and threw her socks? That didn't even register. That was a body she knew. That was a soul she knew. Sheknew him. The one she loved. The one who was dead. The one who had caused so much happiness, and then unspeakable grief. She wore his ring around his neck. She leagally owned his parent's house. She had his wand on her nightstand. Avalee had kept all of his old school pictures. She had visited his grave and put flowers there.

This must have been some dream. Most times she dreamed of him it was his last few seconds of life. This was a heavenly change. This was a heavenly dream. She couldn't even get her legs to work in enough time to chase after him. Tears wouldn't stop.

And then, so quickly it faded to a nightmare. Alice. The one who practically caused Axel's death, was there. And now they simply talked. But not for long. Avalee's world and mind came apart at the seems. She truly couldn't move. They kissed. The kissed!

She stood from afar dumbfounded.

This was reality.
Axel was there.
And Avalee didn't know what to do.

A small and short whimper came from her lips as she realized all of these things.

[Sky]

"He's a good guy." Axel said. "I've always envied him. He had everything he could ever want. His parents, toys, anything. But...he also had love. It wasn't until I came here that I experienced it. I mean, sure, when I was younger and my parents were around, they loved me a lot. But its been years. And...of course they still love me, but...oh, right, Seth. But yeah, I guess...everything over the years just built up and made me into this monster. I hate what I am, what I was." Axel breathed out after his little ramble.
   
  He lifted the hat off of his head and set it on his lap, then looked at Alice.

"I love you Alice, but...there's someone I love more. Someone that makes my heart beat a little differently." He paused, thinking of the right words to say. "Don't tell her that I'm alive. I want her to be happy. She's found somebody, right? Well, she deserves someone who can give her the world."

[potter_fan122]

There it was again, her verbally slapped her.  Her hands tightened into fists, and she was glad her face was hidden in her arms.  Tears didn't form, but her eyes stung.  She felt a coldness seep through her that had nothing to do with the chilly weather.  She could feel her body hardening, turning into something unhuman.

"Fine," She said in a soft voice, half hoping he couldn't hear her.  You would have thought her voice would be cold and sharp, but it wasn't.  She just sounded defeated.  "I won't tell her.  I don't even see her anymore, let alone talk to her."  Slowly Alice lifted her head and looked at Axel.

"But I want you to tell me something:  If you know what I've been through, and you know that I love you, and you know that you love her more than you love me, why did you ask me to kiss you?"

[Sky]

"I needed to know more how you felt." Axel said shortly. Truth was, he actually didn't know what he wanted. He said that because she had a husband back home and didn't want her marriage to fall apart because he was here. He really wished he had run when he had the chance. "This is so hard."

[potter_fan122]

Alice paused, and again her body relaxed.  This whole vampire to human and back again thing was really starting to annoy her.

"About what, Seth?"  She whispered, scrunching her eyebrows together in her confusion.  "I love him, I do, but... I don't know how much longer I can--I don't know if there's someo... I just don't know, okay?  He's so sweet, I don't want to hurt him."  Why would she hurt him?  It was obvious Axel didn't want her anymore.

[Sky]

"Do you regret choosing him?" Axel questioned quietly, his eyes still on hers. He shook his head. "The real question is, are you happy, Alice? Are you happy where you are?" He sighed and looked away.

[potter_fan122]

Alice sat up now, her gaze lowered to the ground as she thought about her answer.

"I... am happy that I'm with him.  He's so sweet, and he would do anything for me.  But... sometimes I feel like he's... holding me back or something.  Like, he's so calm and understanding.  It's like he thinks I never do anything wrong, like he worships me or something."  She closed her eyes and shook her head.  Slowly she inhaled, and Axel's scent filled her.  It was sharp; not like the winter air, but different, like wolf.

"Sometimes I feel like I could be happier with someone more adventerous."  She barely breathed these last words, and with the soft wind blowing she wondered if he would hear her.

Someone more adventerous.  She had said that without really thinking about it, and the more she did, the more she realized it was true.  She needed to be moving constantly, to keep her new blood pumping.  Seth couldn't necessarily do that for her, but Axel could.

Realizing this her eyes widened.  She turned her whole body towards him, on her knees again. 

"Someone like you."

Alice brushed his hair back from his eye.  Those bright, beautiful eyes.  They looked so sad, and she wanted to make that sad look go away.  So she kissed him.

[purpleraincloud]

"No!" Avalee said this in a loud tone. Her voice cracking the tiniest bit. Her joints, which had been locked up for minutes now, snapped back to reality. She snapped back awake. Her legs started moving. Avalee started running. Seeing Alice kiss Axel like that was too much. She snapped. The white snow was crushed under her black boots. People were staring as she ran.

All emotions came flooding back. All memories. In that moment she felt like she was back in that bar. She was still covered in blood. She was running from the pub. She was drinking herself into a blackout trying to forget.

Her heart pounded so loud in her chest. Anxiety rose up in a huge wave. This was it.

"Axel?" Asked in a broken tone as she stopped. Several feet away from the man she still loved.

[Sky]

Axel's eyes closed as he felt those lips, light as a feather, on his, parted so they fit with his own. And he wasn't pulling away this time. His hands found her, fingers tracing pathways through her beautiful black hair, the other around her, pressing her frame closer to him. It was wrong, but...it felt right. It was attention he had longed for for such a long time. But something, a voice yelling, caught his attention, the sound of hurried footsteps causing him to release his grip and look away.

  And Axel nearly felt the oxygen from his lungs leave his body.


"Avalee." He breathed.

[purpleraincloud]

Words could not express what she felt. How long had he been alive. She saw his breath hover midair in the cold. She saw his chest rise and fall. There was colour in his cheeks. His lips were very red, for he had just been kissing. His hair was as bright as ever. He looked healthy even...not like he had the last time her eyes were on him. A the echo of a smile was on her face.

The tickle in her throat and the tears, running slowly down her face made it impossible to speak.

She nodded. Her eyes sad, but hopeful.

[potter_fan122]

*No. Nonononononononono. This can't be happening.  Not today.  Not now.*

Alice lifted her hand to her lips, which felt hot compared to the cold around her.  Her human heart pounded in her chest, forcing her blood to pump heavily.  Clouds of breath puffed out of her mouth.  Those ice blue eyes stared at Avalee, a look of pure astonishment on her face.  This could not be happening.

Quickly, before either of them could move, Alice stood up and put herself between Axel and the girl.  Her long black hair fell into her face and her gaze turned into a glare.  This--this human girl always got in her way.

"He doesn't want to see you right now.  Can't you see that?" She spoke softly, only loud enough to Avalee to hear her.  She just got Axel back and she was not going to share him.  She didn't know if her words were true or not, but she had some experience with lying.