first fan-fic ever, hope you enjoy....its called " okay. "

[kahlan_snow]

                                   " Okay. "
                                  by kahlan snow





Disclaimer: You all know the drill, I do not own Harry Potter. J.K. Rowling does.


Summary: One night after a lovely ball, Harry's girlfriend helps him understand his feelings, feelings that have nothing to do with her.



                                            Part One




   " Oh Harry tonight was just amazing, everything was absolutely beautiful. " said Sally as she undressed for the night

   " Huh, oh yes, yes it was." Harry said thoughtlessly while looking outside his bedroom window.

   " Harry, are you okay, you seemed to be distant tonight? "

   " Yes, I've just had a bit on my mind. Its fine though it'll pass. "

   " It'll pass? "

   " I'm sorry what was that? " he asked as he tore himself away from thought

   Sally walked over and knelled in front of him. " Harry what is it love? Don't tell me nothing, because something has happened. You were fine before the dance. " she sighed and picked herself up when he said nothing.

   " Why do you keep secrets from me? "

   " Sally, I'm really tired, and I don't really feel like having this conversation. " Harry said walking out of his room.

   He decided he was going downstairs for a drink. He thought that when he returned Sally would forget about their talk.
   As he was making his way back to to his room he bumped into Terry Boot. " Hey Harry, some night huh? "

   Harry smiled slightly and  nodded. " Yeah, it was. "

   Harry took note that Terry had only his white shirt on and pants. The rest of his suit and his shoes were in his arms.

   " Are you leaving? " asked Harry all the sudden very curious

   Terry running his hands threw his hair sighed and answered " Its over Harry, she...she said she needed time to herself...You know I was fooling myself to thinking she could actually love me the same as I lovee her. " he let out a fake laugh " You know its funny, tonight was supose to be the night. You know the night that she would finally realize what she had in front of her...that I really do love her.
   Instead she realized she didn't love me. Taked care of her for me will you, Harry. Who ever the lucky bastard is, make sure he treats her well."

   Not waiting for an answer Terry walked out the door.



   When Harry got up to his room he saw that Sally was just sitting on the corner chair Harry had been seated. Her dress gown was folded neatly in the box he gave her. Wearing some old pajama pants and shirt of his. When he walked in she didn't even turn to greet him. Instead she begain talking about the night.

   " You know before the ball you asked me to come over for a surprise? I had no idea what it could have been, I thought maybe, just maybe it was the ball, but thought otherwise. You hate things like that.
   When I showed up you were so happy to see me. You picked me up, and gave me one of those crushing hugs. There so rare, that I can almost recall everytime you've given me one. Usually when you win a game or when you've come back from a long tour.
   You know, whats really familiar about these hugs is that she always gets one too...tonight though, it was only me. Did you know that was my thought? It wasn't wow this feels so good, or wow I love this man so much. No...just...its only me.
   How pathetic is that? To be so childish to think such a way.
   When we arrived at the ball your eyes never left mine. We found a quiet spot, just the two of us. I'm sure anyone who was to have glanced our way would have thought. Now don't they look so happy in love."   You know I even felt we were.
   Then, you left for drinks and came back... different. You tried to behave the same as before, but the you that stared into my eyes and touched me sweetly was gone. Someone else had come back, you tried to be the same as before. Something happend, something between us sitting having a wonderful moment was replaced by thoughts...you've been in your head sense you left me at that table.
   I didn't know what it was untill I walked downstairs just a moment ago.
   I can see by the look in your eyes that you haven't yet figured it out. What you've been fighting in your head to piece together.
   Let me help you Harry."

   He didn't know what to think, she was right. He had been fighting with himself to figure out what it was that put him in such a mood. All day he was in the best of spirits. He felt like he had the world at his finger tips. He had a great career in front of him, good friends, and a great girlfriend.
   Earlier he was sitting around the house thinking all those things when he decided to surprise Sally with news of the ball. He really wanted to make her happy.

   " When you left to get drinks, you saw her didn't you? "

   Harry walked over to his bed and sat.

   " Tell me Harry, did you think that she was beautiful tonight, or did you think about how you never noticed how beautiful she really was? "

   

[kahlan_snow]

                                       Part Two






   " Tell me Harry, did you think that she was beautiful tonight, or did you think about how you never noticed how beautiful she really was? "

   Then like that it happen. Realization.

   Sally, saw instantly the look of understanding flash through his eyes. " I over heard Terry explain to you, what he hoped she would see tonight. I think she did Harry. I think she saw something in your eyes tonight that made her question her relationship with not just him, but you as well.
   I think she's always known her feelings. I think she's the one hoping that one day you'll finally see what Terry wanted her to see.
   That one day you'll look at her and realize she's been standing there this whole time and that you'll finally figure out that you really do love her."



   Harry tried to speak, but he couldn't. Sally helped by telling him it was okay, that they would be friends still. He could tell she was lying. He nodded, hiding the fact that he knew this was the last time they were to see each other.
   She did not bother to take the dress he bought her, he performed a simple charm and the dress vanished to the attic.
   
   Sitting he thought about all the times they spent together, how she was always there when he needed her. How she was concerned about his welfare in front of his own. How her being around was always nice and comforting.
   He thought about the times he was mean, rude and sometimes so angry with her. All the time was because she was doing what she could to protect him. Everything she's always done was for him.



   Harry ran out his room and knocked on her door. " Hermione! Hermione I need to talk to you. Are you in there? " She didn't answer. He thought she must have put some sort of spell up to keep from being disturbed. Maybe she felt Terry would try to come back.

   " Dammit." he said to himself. He started walking downstairs, he didn't want to be in his room tonight. He hoped that maybe he could lay down on the couch and think about what he was going to do.

   " Harry are you alright? Don't tell me your scar is hurting. " said Hermione rising from her spot on the couch.

   " Huh, oh, no...I was just thinking. I thought you were sleeping, I tried knocking on your door. "

   " I couldn't sleep, Terry and I..."

   " Hermione do you love me? " He had to know, and he had to ask before he thought better not to.

   She seemed stunned at first, but only for a moment. " Harry of course I love you, I care for you as I've..."

   " Hermione that's not what I mean. Do you love me? "

   As her eyes begain to water, he knew. Suddenly he was speachless. How could he have not known.

   " Harry, please don't ask me that. " she seemed so fragile just then.

   " How long have you felt this way? "

   She looked up at him angrily. " Harry stop this, why are you saying these things. Are you angry? Why aren't you with Sally upstairs? Are you two talking about me? Is that why your here, to settle some arguement between the two of you...well I can tell you that.."

   " She gone Hermione. " he said over hear voice. " She's gone."

   " Are you coming down here to blame me Harry. " she looked heartbroken

   " Do you love me? " he could feel his heart pumping

   " Harry, don't ..."

   Grabbing her arms he looked straight into her eyes. " Do you love me? "

   " Do you really have to ask? "

   He let her go. He turned and started pacing. She fell back to her seat on the couch.

   He stopped when he saw that she was leaving. " How long have you felt...I mean...why didn't you say anything."

   She stared at him for a moment with an unreadable expression. " I'm going to bed Harry, goodnight. " Then she walked around him up the stairs. Half way up he shouted her name. She stopped but didn't turn. " It's been  a long night, and I'm tired. I've broken up with my boyfriend, and my best friends pissed off that I have feelings for him. I don't think I can handle anymore excitement tonight, now good night. "

   She started for her room hoping to leave him behind, but as she reached the second floor, he caught her arm. When he did she tried to get away. He was stronger than her by far and he held her against the wall as to keep her still.

   " I'm not pissed off that my best friend has feelings for me. I'm pissed off that I didn't know, that she didn't tell me. I'm pissed that it's taken me this long to realize how I feel about you."
   " Yesterday I didn't know, today I didn't know, not even at the ball when you said hello and my heart skipped a beat did I know.
   Did you know tonight I couldn't keep a single thought in my head. I felt so confussed and I didn't understand why. Sally tonight helped me figure it out, then she left.  My own girlfriend, well ex now, knew how I felt about you. "
   
   He let her go as he felt her calm down and touched her face. " Now that I  know, Hermione, now that I know I love you. I promise you that I'll love you so much that you won't be able to remember a time I didn't. "

   She smiled knowing that he ment every word. " Okay. " was all she could say.

             " Okay." he nodded with a smile. Then he kissed her.