Dumb Blonde Jokes

[Roniloveyou:)]

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger.
First Blonde: "I can't seem to get this door unlocked!
Second Blonde: "Well you better hurry up. It's starting to rain and the top is down!"


A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied,"You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."


Why can't you tell blondes knock-knock jokes? Because they go answer the door.

How did the dumb blonde break her leg raking leaves? She fell out of the tree.

Did you hear about the blonde who tried to blow up her husband's car? She burned her lips on the tailpipe.

*-----okay that's all i've got... for now...these are funny but i do feel kinda bad so no offense to any blondes in here, my gf is a blonde so really i love blondes  ;D -----*

[harrypotterfan:)]

A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied,"You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."

((LOL....OMG loved that one.... ;D ))

[dobby888]

dont worry im a blonde and these are my favorite kind of jokes!!

A blonde was walking along one side of a canal. As she was walking, she noticed another blond walking on the other side of the canal. She hollered over"Excuse me, how can I get to the other side?" That blonde replied "Duh, you're already on the other side!"

A blonde puts a book on the librarian's desk, and says, "This book has no story and way too many characters." The librarian says, "So that's where the phone book went."

A blonde was at the doctor for a checkup, and the doctor said, "You're getting older, so I need to ask this: Have you ever been incontinent?"
The blonde said, "Yes. I've been to Europe twice."

ok thats all for now, but ill do some more tommorrow

[Lola_La_Fringe7]

omg these r soooooooo hysterical o heres one i hope i remember it. ok...

a blonde walks into a casino and starts to gamble she says i hope you dont mind but i like to gamble naked so she takes off all her clothes and rolls the dice. Woo hoo she says i won then she grabs all the money and takes the dice with her. Hey said a guy did u even see what the dice were? No said the oth guy i was 2 bizzy watching something else!!!

[Roniloveyou:)]

omg these r soooooooo hysterical o heres one i hope i remember it. ok...

a blonde walks into a casino and starts to gamble she says i hope you dont mind but i like to gamble naked so she takes off all her clothes and rolls the dice. Woo hoo she says i won then she grabs all the money and takes the dice with her. Hey said a guy did u even see what the dice were? No said the oth guy i was 2 bizzy watching something else!!!

lmao this is great haven't heard it before  ;D

[dobby888]

yeah heres the full version (same one more to it)

a hot blonde walks into a casino. she says i hpe you dont mind but im luckier naked!! so she tkes of all her clothes. ill bet 20,000$ she says and then rolls the dice. woohoo!!!!! she screams, she grabs the money, her clothes and leaves. then the 2 guys in charge of the game said to each other...... did u see what she rolled??* said one *no i thought u were watch*said the other *i thought YOU where watching!!!*


lol i love that one...............

[Ginny Weasly]

A blond goes to the doctor . When the doctor asks her whats wrong, she says, "I hurt everywhere!" She pokes herself in the arm, 'Here," She pokes herself in the chest, "And here," and she pokes herself in the cheek, "And here!" The docotr looksat her for a moment and says, "You don't hurt everywhere. You broke your finger."

[LordBlaZe]

A blond goes to the doctor . When the doctor asks her whats wrong, she says, "I hurt everywhere!" She pokes herself in the arm, 'Here," She pokes herself in the chest, "And here," and she pokes herself in the cheek, "And here!" The docotr looksat her for a moment and says, "You don't hurt everywhere. You broke your finger."

lmfao that's too funny hahaah ;D ;D ;D

[HermioneFan]

i don't know if anyone posted this one but...

a blonde girl comes up to a crosswalk guard person and tells him, "i'm sick and tired of everyone telling me that blondes are stupid so last night i stayed up the wwhole night memorizing the capitals of the US states.
crossguard - "okay, so what's the capitol (sp?) of Nevada?"
blonde girl thinks for a moment and then answers, "hm, n!

[Roniloveyou:)]

hahahaha i've never heard that one either...

[dobby888]

yeah me either!!!

A man walks into a bar. Two blondes are at a table chanting, "6 months". Another blonde comes and joins the chant. Another and then another until a dozen blondes are chanting "6 months". Finally the man goes over and asks what the chanting is about. The first blond says, "We are a team solves jigsaw puzzles. Our last one took 6 months to finish." The man says, "That is impressive." The blonde replies, "I should say so, the box said 3 to 4 years." 

[Shara2007]

Man those are great.

[HermioneFan]

yeah me either!!!

A man walks into a bar. Two blondes are at a table chanting, "6 months". Another blonde comes and joins the chant. Another and then another until a dozen blondes are chanting "6 months". Finally the man goes over and asks what the chanting is about. The first blond says, "We are a team solves jigsaw puzzles. Our last one took 6 months to finish." The man says, "That is impressive." The blonde replies, "I should say so, the box said 3 to 4 years." 

OMG! lol never heard that one :) How many peices did it have? ;)

[Roniloveyou:)]

yeah me either!!!

A man walks into a bar. Two blondes are at a table chanting, "6 months". Another blonde comes and joins the chant. Another and then another until a dozen blondes are chanting "6 months". Finally the man goes over and asks what the chanting is about. The first blond says, "We are a team solves jigsaw puzzles. Our last one took 6 months to finish." The man says, "That is impressive." The blonde replies, "I should say so, the box said 3 to 4 years." 

i think this one just might be the best one posted so far!!! I literally fell backwards out of my chair (no fear my bed saved me  ;D) omfg too funny ;D ;D ;D

[Lola_La_Fringe7]

heres one its not a dumb blonde but its funny

ok... theres a girl jumping on a sewer lid saying 6 6 6 6. A man sees her doing it and comes over to ask why shes doing that. Its fun she replies. Try it! ok says the guy. So he trys it. wow this is fun he says! so when hes still jumping the girl grabs the sewer cover and pulls it out from underneath him then she jumps again saying 7 7 7 7 !!!!!