.blue is the same old misery

[Xaver]

Xaver allowed her nearness, despite having to fight the urge to feed off it - allowed her to touch him, despite the beast being on a short leash, within him. A feat foes, and allies alike, that had ever really known Xaver like only Ginny had, in this realm, world - would have been gaping at. The sweet smell, and peach soft touch of her skin sent waves of goosebumps skittering across his pale flesh, his own blood racing at the sound of hers, singing so close.

It would have been so easy.
The remaining threads of his own personality fought the sheer carnal instinct, screaming against the thought.
Perhaps she didn't know, how easy. How first-nature, if he lost control, it would be to bring her down like prey. And perhaps not feed, but destroy. Ravish.

She spoke to him, and the words barely registered, the misty, chaotic greys of his eyes locked onto hers, his natural blues fading in and out, but mostly missing from his naturally dark orbs.
When the majority left the room, the suffocating novacaine of temptation waned, slightly, and needles pricked behind his eyes. Xaver clenched his jaw, beneath the warmth of her hand, his heartbeat an irregular, quick thud pulsing in his temple, and he sighed, a low, uneven mumble of sound...

[Ginny Weasly]

Ginny slipped her hand down from his cheek, patting it slightly before stepping back. She tilted her head at him, knowing full well what he was capable of. But also wondering briefly if he really would be able to allow himself to strike at her, even in the state he was in now.

She wasn't going to test it.

"Why don't you sit down, love? Sam knows some healing magic and can at least help to make you comfortable until we get someone with knowledge of your anatomy." She nodded towards the bed, or towards the chairs near it. It was hard to tell since she refuse to look away from his eyes. She smiled slightly, "I'm afraid I'm most useless. Cody's never had anything more than a scratch..."

[Xaver]

Would he have been able to, even in an uncontrolled state, attack Ginny?
Xaver disgusted himself on too many levels, in knowing that, simply - he didn't know. He didn't know how far he could go on rash, animal impulse.. How far he would go.

Avoiding the chance at all costs of hurting her, seemed the best way.

Best, when he could feel such instincts, and savage lust, burning, crawling, just beneath his skin.
Just beneath his sanity.

Xaver shuddered, and looked away from her, finally. Disgusted with himself, and what he was.

"He could do little."

He figured, anyway.

Hellfire.

[Ginny Weasly]

"Oh, I don't know. Sam is from a time when our realms were interconnected." Ginny gently took his hand, pulling him towards the chairs and the bed, "He knows a bit. I'm sure he can do something to help your body."
Not his mind, though. Ginny felt a guilty pang as she thought that, knowing it wasn't his fault he was this way.

Sam stayed where he was, letting Ginny do what she needed to settle Xaver down. He said nothing, not wanting to aggravate the Fallen, nor Ginny.

[Xaver]

Xaver's gaze shifted suddenly, to Sam, when Ginny mentioned he was from ages ago - and within the depths of his eyes, now a monotone, startling clear blue, there was a new, odd emotion sparking to life.
Something that could have been surprise..
...Or deeply ingrained worry.


He allowed himself to be pulled, though he moved more like the unnerved wild animal he partially was, within, almost unsure of his steps. Appreciative, on a different level, of Sam's knowledge of subtlety.
His wings materialized, enormous, thick, satiny and of sheer, ancient beauty, folding behind him in a most natural pose.

Xaver stopped, beside the chairs, but did not sit down. Did not allow himself to, his gaze flickering between Sam, and Ginny.

"My Love," he said, very softly, his tones more his own, now, than they had been in a while. "Above any others, you know who I am."
Through a reserved, shielded glance, he looked at her.
"But not so much... What I am."

[Ginny Weasly]

"There is no what, love. You are you." Ginny's answer was one she often gave to Cody, whenever he felt vastly different, "Your species is the only thing I know nothing of." She smiled, tightly, but with a hidden meaning.
She meant that she knew he wasn't human. She had known for a long time. She meant that whatever he was made no difference to her, for she loved him, and always would.
"Sit, love. Tell if you feel the need, but sit down."

[Xaver]

"I am me.."

He almost smiled, a little sadly, the unearthly taste in his mouth souring to a dull, uneasy tang.

"Perhaps that is why I worry."

Xaver slowly dropped onto the chair, the gravity of his injuries catching up with him, though he fought not to show it. To show at all.

"But that is what I meant," he said softly. "..My kind."

[Ginny Weasly]

Sam slowly walked to them, but stayed a respectful distance from them. Still, he said nothing, simply waited for Ginny's instructions.

Ginny sat on a chair opposite Xaver, taking his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze to reassure him, "What of your kind, love?"

[Xaver]

As Sam neared, then stopped, Xaver blinked as that ageless hunger came gnawing to life on his nerves. He looked between Ginny, and Sam, then to Ginny's hand. Clasping his own, without the hesitation or scare so many wore in the face of him.

And he understood, and was relieved, despite the fact he burned, within.
Ached, to attack, to hunt, though he gripped the hunger with an iron fist.

"You are my exception," he said, almost simply.
Xaver stared at her a moment.
"So obvious, I've been oblivious to it all these years."

He glanced at Sam, then fixed his gaze upon Ginny, sighing, slightly, and fidgeting unconsciously.
Xaver shook the thoughts away, then looked to the side.

"You are from what time?" he questioned, to Sam.

[Ginny Weasly]

Sam thought for a moment, "From before Time was measured..." he was quiet, trying to recall an easy way to  pinpoint the time, "When I was a child, your people were a marvel, a mystery to which none of us knew the answer. I'm afraid it made some people react in a negative manner towards your kind..."

Ginny squeezed Xaver's hand slightly, still a bit confused as to what he had meant by her being his exception. Exception to what? She glanced at Sam, then back to Xaver, "Time is a confusing topic. The only light I can shed on it is he comes from a Time when humans were awakening as intelligent beings."

[Xaver]

"It reminds me of the present," he said, somewhat thoughtfully.

Xaver slouched in his chair, still holding Ginny's hand, his wings loosely encircling his lean, toned form, a heavy contrast to his shady, pale skin, the dark, sticky rivers of blood that had coursed over the flat contours of his chest standing out mercilessly.

"Though, sometimes, I suppose we deserved our reputation. Like the way I nearly lost myself with that innocent, earlier.. It was so easy to lose control back then."

His creature was relaxing. It showed, in the lessening tension in his shoulders, and the ever deepening, ever mellowing oceans his eyes were returning to.

In the way Sam, sitting so patiently at his distance, smelled so less tempting.

[Ginny Weasly]

"If it helps, I think it's doubtful that he will ever become a thief later in life, " Ginny interjected with a half smile. Xaver had scared the boy so much, he'd probably be wary of touching things that didn't belong to him for a long time.

She clasped his hand between both of her own, leaning forward slightly, "Love, it is always easy to lose control. Control takes energy, but I have no doubt you are capable of patience and love and kindness when you need to be."

Sam listened to Ginny's words, wondering if she realized the words she were speaking were probably more powerful than any spell that had ever left her lips.

[Xaver]

"Mm.. Scared the pathway right out of him."
He could have smiled, had his heart not felt so heavy.

When she gathered his hand between her own, Xaver looked at her, and after her words he was quiet, for a long, poweful silence. Absorbing what she had said.

"I am capable," he said softly. "Of what once I did not even understand, I am now capable."

His gaze was heavy, if one could be so.

"But is it right... That I am capable of doing such things.. But it is simply instinct, to hunt. To strike. To ravage. To desire, to destroy. It is a Hunger. The Hunger."

[Ginny Weasly]

"Well of course it is instinct. You are a man." Ginny's lips twitched slightly upward before she became serious again, "Really, if it weren't for that carnal instinct, would your ancestors have survived? Would mine? That hunger resides in everyone, love. It is strong in you because your upbringing was centered around it."

She tilted her head slightly, "Many have instincts they are ashamed of, but most are able to control those impulses for the larger part. When you can't, you really aren't to be blamed. A person is only evil when they make the decision to do something evil when they are in complete control." She winked lightly, "And you, are not evil."

[Xaver]

A phantom of a smile haunted the contours of his mouth for a fleeting moment. Dissolving quickly, though the fact that it had been there, was well enough to bring life back into the features of his handsome face.

"It is not being the wrath. It is the wrath, within."

For a moment, he looked at her through those dark, glossy blue oceans, contemplating his thoughts.

"Lack of control over my own savage is a weakness," he said, harshly. "You tell me of another man who can smell the sweet scent of your blood beneath your creamy skin, and whose own heart soars when his thoughts become not his own - thirsty. But not to drink, but to spill your precious lifesource. To feast in your pain, and the blasphemy of your disfigurement, and taste your death."

His gaze had been forced away, and Xaver shuddered, visibly, then, a physical chill seeping through his skin. He shook his head.

"If I lose control, that is the hunger. Not to survive. To destroy."

Xaver blinked, his gaze sliding back to Ginny.

"You are my one exception. You smell the nicest, taste the sweetest - but there is nothing more.. than that. You are what I endlessly crave, but not in that same dark desire. Do you understand.. a little?"