1000 Things Snape (no offense,ShuiBee) would never do

[*~*Hermione*~*]

OK,heres 1:
    Say this 2 a squirrel:
        "squirrly,can I call U squirrly?I must say,I have never felt this way before.I mean,as I watch U bring me acorns,something stirs inside me.As I see U coming 2 me,trotting on your muscular legs,tail erect, I FEEL LUV!! :o :o :o I ADMIT 2 IT!!!SAY IT!!! SAY U LUV ME AS I LUV U!!!" then laughs like a maniac as Squirrly takes cover. :o ;D ;D ;D ;D

[.:~*Shuiliya*~:.]

*cries* Noooo!  Snape!  How could you??  :'(  ;D

[Verenchen]

*criesoutloudandcouldkillHermione12*
HOW COULD YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT?OR JUST THINK ABOUT IT?
Severus is not gay. He's cool and sexy!!!!!!!!! :-)

[Gengi]

Snape.......gag.......ahem.

Heehee! I've got a couple! Probably not that good....but hey!

"Harry, I have given this some thought, and, well....may I adpot you? Pretty please?!"

"Professor Lupin, dearest of friends, may I use your deodorant?"

[.:~*Shuiliya*~:.]

heehee funny!  I have two!

a) ...and the next morning, Snape walked into the great hall wearing hot pink robes and smiling....
~~~~~~~~~~~~
b) "Hey, Harry... does something seem weird about Snape today?"

Harry strained his eyes and said amazedly "Snape washed his hair!!!"

[*~*Hermione*~*]

LOL!!!!!!!! U guys R hilarious!!!! Verenchen, I said nothing about Snape being gay, just cross-species!! ;D :o ;D
 *holds up the sign of the cross and shrieks:*
 NOOOOO!!!! DON'T HURT MEEEEEEEE!!!!! I BEG 4 FORGIVENESS!!!!!!

[Verenchen]

Ok, I must admit: It's all very funny!!!!!
Especially the thing with the Deodorant!*lol*
 ;D

[Kaeli]

How about...

Neville, do you need some help with your potions?

or

Hermione, I have got to hand it to you, you are one of the brightest students I have ever had the pleasure to teach.

[.:~*Shuiliya*~:.]

those are good ones too!
My fav was the deodorant one too.

[*~*Hermione*~*]

Snape wood never:
1~hit on Hermione
2~kiss Ron's shoes and say " U are my sunshine,my only sunshine! U are there wen skies are gray,oh pleeze,don't take my sunshine away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3~give Harry Potter a car 4 no reezen

[cho chang]

Oh! I know one!
*Snape walk in to the classroom* Hi class! today we're
going to learn love potion!

[.:~*Shuiliya*~:.]

*cracks up* Good one, Cho!  Hermione, your #2 and #3 are great, too!  I still think that Snape could be with Hermione (the character), tho.

[cho chang]

I know another!
     Snape gave Gryffindore 100 points, take away 100 points from Slytherin.

[hpcoolest5]

I know one! ;D
Snape walks into the classroom and says, "Good morning class, having a lovely day, I hope?"

Mcgonnagle lets everyone transform her classroom into an elephant so they can have rides

Madame Hooch takes out her yellow contacts before going to sleep

Madame Maxime and Kakaroff kiss and make up

 ;D

[.:~*Shuiliya*~:.]

lol!!!  I bet some of those are true, too!